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an everyday life

an everyday life

Tag Archives: Mesta Park

A Yankee Transplant

06 Saturday Jun 2009

Posted by Janell in In the Garden, Life at Home, Mesta Park

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Aging, Death, Everyday Life, Mesta Park, Oklahoma Gardening, Parents, Writing

The old stressed Magnolia outside my window is blooming profusely this summer, which is not a good sign.  Sensing its days are numbered, the Magnolia is reproducing many seeds, in hope that some will land on fertile ground.  I often wonder how old the Magnolia is.  Was it planted back in 1928, when the home’s first owners moved into what is now Mesta Park?  If so, my tree would be close to Daddy’s age. 

I’ve an interest in knowing more about Daddy’s early days as well.  But he has no interest in me knowing.  This Saturday and last, I invited Dad to confirm bits and pieces of his childhood told to me by his sister, my Aunt Carol.  He ignores me.  But later, when I wonder aloud a simple question about the actors on an old Andy Griffith show we are watching together, he has no trouble getting his point across.   Only the trivial is worthy of a response.  

So Daddy’s past appears irrevocably closed.  I will not attempt to cross back to the land of his childhood again.  But today, I learned that even our shared past is full of unknowns, because my point of view is different than Daddy’s.  This lesson was brought home by thumbing through a travel journal I made Daddy seven years ago, on the occasion of his seventy-second birthday. 

The journal records memories of a vacation we took eleven years ago — Daddy, Christi, Don and I– when we stayed seven days in Ireland and three days each in London and Paris.   I kept a contemporaeous journal of our travels and I think it was Christi who put the bug in my ear that Daddy might enjoy a copy of my memories for himself.  So it was Daddy’s copy of the travel journal I picked up this afternoon, in an effort to share memories with Daddy, even while Daddy was off on his own travels in the land of  nod.  

At the end of my words on Paris, I was surprised to run across an entry in Daddy’s own handwriting, that seven years ago, was still strong and legible, rather the faint hieroglyphics it has become today.  Daddy’s memories of Paris were different than mine, he wrote, probably because he was older than me.  For one, Daddy loved seeing the bird’s eye view of Notre Dame and the Eiffel Tower, as we circled the city in the air on our arrival into Paris.  And he also expressed thanks that Don was willing to climb 160 feet of stairs to the top of the Arc de Triumph, for he didn’t think he would ever forget seeing eleven roads converge into one.   Simple things became unforgettable for Daddy. 

And though not simple himself, Daddy too will be unforgettable.  Though the rich and lovely memories that I share with Daddy alone… as well as the dark secrets of the past that remain unknown by any save Daddy… will all die with Daddy’s death.   When that happens, a small part of me will die too, because Daddy’s life and mine are intertwined, and his passing will leave me with unfillable void.  

No so with the old Magnolia outside my window.  And while I mean no disrespect, when this old girl dies, I’ll just plant another tree.   And it will not be another Magnolia or any other southern tree.  Rather, if such a thing exists, perhaps a nice Yankee tree, in memory of Daddy, that like Daddy himself, will prove a strong transplant for Oklahoma.  

Steel Magnolia

13 Wednesday May 2009

Posted by Janell in In the Garden, Mesta Park, Soul Care, The Great Outdoors

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Tags

Everyday Life, Magnolia Trees, Mesta Park, Oklahoma Gardening, Writing

With my husband out of town for what seems like forever, I’m reduced to keeping up with local weather forecasts on my own. 

So having done my homework before tuning in, I was surprised to be awakened at 2 a.m. last night by the far away sound of  thunder.  A silent minute later, deciding the thunder had been a vivid dream, I settled back into bed, to again hear what sounded like another rumble.  A strong Oklahoma wind, 40 mph whipping down the plain fast, soon had my old windows humming and vibrating.  

Then came the rain.  And memories of twenty years of  tropical storms I had experienced when living ten miles from the Texas coast were reawakened to rest along side me.  Remembering the damage of tropical winds, I half expected to wake up  a downed Magnolia tree in our backyard this morning.  Soggy soil and strong wind proved a deady combination for many huge Texas trees.  And our old Magnolia tree is not doing well. 

In the last  three year’s, our poor tree has been put through something akin to the tree world’s trials of Job.  Its first three bruisings came compliments of the Oklahoma weather rollercoaster.   Three yeasrs ago, our State was in the midst of a long drought.  As luck woud have it, the drought was broken briefly the day we moved in, by a  light Methodist sprinkle of water falling from the sky.  Though not a Baptist dunking, it did a fine job of baptizing us into our new life in Mesta Park.  

Our  first  summer proved a scorcher, with many broken record days of over 100 degree heat.   And our poor old Magnolia just suffered  since I didn’t know to  give it a slow and long weekly drink.  The following  summer we experienced a monsoon, when the entire month of June was one big rainy day.  Then six months later, we were crippled by freezing rain that ended up damaging and felling many old trees that in turn took out the neighborhood power lines.  I don’t think I’ll ever forget the arrival of the Oklahoma National Guard in front of our house, who chainsawed and stacked the remains of a fallen limb, that once reached across the street from a neighbor’s gorgeous American Elm.  The limb itself was large enough to completely cutoff traffic.  Our Magnolia lost a few limbs and more than a few branches and like the other trees of the neighborhood, has looked a little crippled ever since.

Then last summer, as if the Oklahoma weather hadn’t done enough to kick this old  tree around, we gave it another beating by beginning our backyard construction project, distrubing  the tree’s root system.  After the damage was done I learned that Magnolia’s, more than most, just hate to have their feet messed with.  But so far, it lives.

May and June brings a lot of leaf drop on Magnolia trees in Oklahoma.  And while everyday is a leaf drop sort of day for a Magnolia, the tree absolutley rains leaves four weeks a year, even without wind.  This past week I’ve collected a full grocery sack every day.   And the transformation has been incredible — two weeks ago our tree had so many off color leaves it looked sick with yellow fever, while today its mostly a waxy green shiny.  

Magnolia leaf drop, which leaves a tree a little naked and exposed, is nature’s way of preparing the tree for its season of blooms.  Beneath all those yellow leaves on my old tree, were creamy Magnolia blooms waiting for their moment in the sun.  And I absolutely love Magnolia blooms.  Even now, one is partially opened with a bee  circling it madly, but kept from its vocation by the still strong Oklahoma wind. 

I pray our tree will prove a survivor just like that one down the street at the Murrah Memorial.  Two more years may tell whether its out of the woods.  And in the meantime, I’ll just watch the blooms unfold and tend to the tree’s needs, as best as I can, as this old Job steels itself for another long hot summer.  And while the tree wrestles with God for new life, I’ll just pick up its old cast-offs, offer it long and slow refreshing summer drinks, and let it soak in some Epsom Salts over the winter. 

And  unlike Job’s friends, I’ll attend its wounds in silence.

Mother’s Day

09 Saturday May 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Prayer

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Tags

Everyday Life, Friends, Love, Mesta Park, Mother's Day, OKC Dining Out, Prayer, Raising Children, Writing

I’m not one to send out Mother’s Day cards. 

Oh, I have and have had the best of intentions.  But even when Mom was alive, I’d expressed my sentiments with flowers rather than Hallmark.  I’d buy a card and forget to send it.  Then it’d keep company with others in my large stockpile of forgotten and unsent cards.  Just the like the one I hold for my dear friend Ann.  I ran across ‘Ann’s’ card a few months ago when selecting a card for another and well… fell in love with it all over again and full of hope and new resolve I thought, this year I’ll get it sent.  But rats, I’ve missed the magical deadline again.  Perhaps next year?  Or maybe next week — with a sheepish smile?

You’d think a CPA who practiced in the tax field for twenty-some years would be able to meet a pesky deadline.  But no, that’s just not who I am, which may be why management took me out of compliance and assigned me to special projects.  I’m rarely on time to any event, even when I give myself cushion and a range.  Just last week I told my brother I’d pick him up between 2:15 and 2:30 and didn’t make it until 2:40 p.m.  Is this a sign of thoughtlessness, or to rob words from St. Paul, “not regarding others as better than myself?”  Perhaps.  Though much of  my lateness and inability to meet deadlines occurs while robbing ‘Peter’ to pay ‘Paul’. 

The way I best manage my flighty behavior is to avoid definite commitments – and by not setting precedents I know I can’t keep up with – like sending out Mother’s Day cards.  I’m helping my daughter Kara today so she and her husband Joe can go to Tulsa and ‘wine and dine’ his mom for Mother’s Day, without worrying about their dogs they needed to leave behind.  Last night, she asked me what time I’d be by for care and feed.  I offered up a big range – 4:00 to 6:00 pm I said – thinking surely, even I can fit into this spacious gap of time.  But what if I’m a little late?  Will the dogs tattle on me?  Will the dogs care?  No, dogs are so doggone forgiving; they never hold a grudge, even when you’ve not met their expectations.

So like the dog I am, I hold no expectations of Mother’s Day dinners or lunches or even cards, though by the grace of God, I’ve been invited to eat brunch with Kara tomorrow morning at my most favorite restaurant in all of OKC – Paseo Grill – which sits just a few blocks north of my Mesta Park home.  Kara is coming to pick me up, and I just love to be chauffeured around.  And if I don’t hear from my other three children…well, let’s just say I understand.  All too well…

Picking up the phone or sending flowers or a card is a lovely thing to do.  But really, can we just banish the official day, for those of us who beat to a different drum, who like to be spontaneous and not hemmed in by a single day?  I know my kids love me, whether or not they acknowledge their love tomorrow.  And I hope the four women in my life who sent me a card know how much I love them too.

To them, and to others like them, I say my heartfelt thanks and cheer you on from the sidelines.  I wish I could be more like you.  At one time, I pretended to be.  And maybe that’s what that card stockpile is all about.  But alas, I am who I am.  Not a thoughtless slug exactly.  But more like one who thinks too much, who expresses herself best in silence and unsent words and thoughts of love, who loves to pick up cards that express words that are true to her spirit, like these that rest on a Patience Brewster card hiding in my stack of unsent cards, but then forgets to send it:

“Through the Silence, I Send a Thousand Prayers…”

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