What would I do if I won the lottery tomorrow?
It was a question I was asked several weeks ago by my spiritual director. I had been talking about feeling stuck. Maybe I was whining, because God knows, I have been struggling a little of late. All the activities that once brought me great joy no longer do. Whether its writing, spiritual direction training, even gardening – all has lost its luster.
That question has proved life-giving. So maybe it’s not so bad to be stalled, since I’ve taken the last two weeks to take stock of where I am and where I want to be, five years down the road. I’ve asked myself questions like, would I travel around the world? Would my husband and I retire to some little lake house a little further south? Would I continue to garden and to write? Can I see myself sitting as spiritual director for fellow seekers? Oddly enough, I can respond ‘yes’ to all of these questions.
But strangely, the thing I would most like to do in the world, if money were no object, is to buy old unloved houses and restore them. And would you believe I said this to Curt, with no thought whatsoever, on the very night he first posed his ‘litmus’ test question. And the answer is really no different now, after two weeks of pondering.
So imagine my surprise, when a week ago, my sister told me that she wanted to try to keep rather than sell my parent’s former home. The house that my father Jack built twenty-five years ago is going to get rebuilt from top to bottom; my sister plans to replace the roof, windows, kitchen appliances and redecorate surfaces, like walls, flooring, ceilings.
This property that my sister inherited has been in my mother’s family since the late forties — my sister and I ran across the warranty deed when we were clearing out the house last week. I believe my grandparents bought the house from one of my great uncles — though, originally, I understand the house belonged to the parents of two great-aunts.
The original home purchased by my grandparents was demolished over ten years ago, though the front porch of that original home still stands. My mother began a garden around that old porch and a new grape arbor I had built nearby. And my sister, being the gardener that she is, will likely refurbish and add to the small garden our mother left behind.
My sister will be a wonderful caretaker of the property. Christi knows exactly what color she wants to paint the exterior — and she has so many ideas for the inside. And yesterday, while Christi and I were painting the front sitting room a lovely shade that can only be described as the color of homemade vanilla ice cream, Christi asked me to help her.
All I can say it that even though the house is my sister’s and not mine, I feel as if I’ve just won the lottery.
How exciting! I’m glad you’ve got a project to grab your interest. My house is 106 years old and I have had a wonderful time painting and fixing and have much more work to do.
To me, there is something therapeutic, taking something and making it beautiful. If I had the money, I would love to do just as you said. I’ve always told my mother I have enough ideas to decorate several homes!
Enjoy the dreaming and scheming.
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Jenn,
I am excited. My sister’s house will be a creative outlet that may end up feeding my writing… and vice-versa.
How wonderful that you are able to live in a house so old. My house follows a generation behind yours — build in 1928, it’s now 82 years old. A century ago, homes were built to last, by craftsman that truly cared about the legacy they were leaving behind.
Funny that we’d both choose to work on old homes rather than idle away on a sandy beach somewhere sipping pina coladas… Is it the chance to give back that attracts us — or the chance to play creatively like God and child with grown-up colors — paints and fabrics and stains and flowers?
I don’t know the answer — except that the desire to transform the sow’s ear into a silk purse has been in my blood since I was 10 — I once tried to convert a junkyard with concrete “tanks” into a swimming pool, that sit behind my aunt and uncle’s trailer in Marlow, Oklahoma. I just knew it would be fabulous — and for a while, my two cousins that I recruited helped me — but once the reality of heavy work sit in, their sense of vision evaporated in the heat of a Oklahoma summer day.
If your old house is anything like mine, I’m sure we both have plenty of creative opportunities with which to spread our decorative wings.
Janell
Is it the chance to give back that attracts us — or the chance to play creatively like God and child with grown-up colors?
I think there’s a third, rather different answer, and it’s the answer that will feed your writing. But I’ve tucked my answer into my snippets envelope and I’ll just hang on to it for a while. We’ll compare, down the road 😉
Linda,
A third possibility? Of course, I’m curious to unwrap your thoughts… especially if it feeds my writing spirit. But all in good time…. or all in God’s time.
Janell