• About
  • Recipe Index
  • Daddy Oh

an everyday life

an everyday life

Tag Archives: Prayer

Living the Questions

30 Wednesday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Prayer, Soul Care

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Everyday Life, Prayer, Ranier Maria Rilke, Soul Care, Writing

“Do not seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them.  And the point is, to live everything.  Live the questions now.”     — Ranier Maria Rilke

A year ago today, I penciled this question across the lines of my journal:

“Can I bring everyday life in one of Oklahoma City’s oldest neighborhoods to life?”

Sitting in the shadows of the question was a prayer: “God …be with me.”

Questions and prayers are sparks of faith.  They light the way out of darkness.   We would not bother to speak them if no one were there to listen.

Writing for this blog is an exercise of faith.   When God is in it, the writing breathes.  It grows, it flows and transforms before my very eyes.  Words and thoughts I had no intention of writing are written.  The direction changes in mid-sentence and answers come.  A post is finished and I wonder at my role in it.

In writing, I come closest to experiencing God.  Perhaps if I were a better writer, I might exercise more control and rely less on faith.  Yet this approach doesn’t seem to work for me.

This blog, that was created a year ago today, was empty of posts for twenty-five days.  On day twenty-six, in publishing my first post, I learned I must write out of poverty and empty hands.  Only then will answers have space to grow.

I have found answered questions to be as life-giving as answered prayers.  In writing my everyday life, they are one and the same.

Tears and Fears

26 Saturday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Prayer, Soul Care

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Bible, Everyday Life, Love, Prayer

I had no plan to write about this morning’s biblical readings when I sat down at the keyboard this afternoon.  But that’s often how writing is with me.  I sit down to write one thing and out comes another.   I guess the stronger words reign victorious in their fight for life.

Of course, the Bible is full of strong words, many which make for disturbing thoughts.  Sometimes I’m desolate after my morning quiet time, as I see that people across time haven’t changed much — and that the changes for good within myself are painfully slow.  Perhaps, in some ways, we are all slow learners, especially when it comes to learning the lessons that matter most in life.

This morning’s reading from Psalms was a variation on the old “eye-for-an-eye” theme.  Most would agree that there is nothing wrong in expecting value for value;  to settle for anything less than what we are due is to be taken advantage of — and God knows, I feel stupid when I’ve let someone get the best of me.

Yet, in my favorite prayer chair this morning, I felt more disturbed than stupid, as I listened to the psalmist’s heart-wrenching prayer.  Distilling through all the rhetoric, I heard the psalmist’s pray boil down to this:  “We scratched your back and now God, it’s your turn to scratch ours.   Don’t let us down, man.”

I wonder how the psalmist prayer sat with God, as I flee for the good news of John.  After the Psalms, I’m in need of a bit of good news.  But it doesn’t take long for my eyes to water as truth splashes me in the face.

I’m now sitting with Jesus, who is pouring out his heart to teach others about his family business.  Jesus it seems, is full of heavenly notions about what it really means to love God and what it really means to love one another.  It’s clear that Jesus is upsetting the apple cart  with lessons that don’t quite mesh with his audience’s way of thinking.  Doesn’t Jesus see that he’s letting his listeners down?

I finally escape to John’s first epistle where I see the old apostle imploring his flock to love.  “All you need is love, folks — heavenly business is simple enough for a baby to do,” John seems to say.  “There’s no need to worry about whose turn it is to do what, forget about keeping tallies, everyone’s a winner when love trumps fear.”

This doddering saint seems to be saying that when we let one another down, we let down God and worse of all — at least in God’s eye — we let down ourselves.  Heavenly business seems to be about stooping down to pick up the ones that are let down by life and making them the apple of our eyes.  Back scratching is just one way to express it.

Crosstalk

05 Saturday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

Everyday Life, Prayer, Soul Care, Writing

I don’t know why.  But today I’m feeling blue.  I feel the need to have a good cry.   I was already feeling depleted when my husband got cross with me about nothing important.

It is rare to be in the aim of my husband’s crossfire.  Which may be why it hurts so bad when it comes.   It’s unexpected, so left field.

The Christmas tree, the source of my husband’s angst, sits ready to decorate.  But I’m in no mood to tackle the chore.  It can wait.

Nor am I in the proper frame of mind to write, though Lord knows I need to write; the Advent lesson is finished but I’ve barely begun drafting Thursday’s contemplative prayer meditation.  Then there is still the Christmas letter.  Both writing projects were on today’s agenda.  These too can wait.

This being at cross-purposes will pass, the fog will lift and I’ll soon feel more up to the task of dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s.

My husband apologized for being cross.  Too bad I can’t just flip a switch and be fine again.  Or at least pretend  to be or say that I’m fine — keeping my fingers crossed, of course.

No better to play it honest.  And humble.  And real.  As in, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.”

And suddenly I remember this is the two-year anniversary of my mother’s death, the day Mom crossed from one world to the next.  And maybe when she breathed her last, maybe she offered up, in her mind, these same last words of Jesus, this higher form of crosstalk.

And In a way that I can’t fathom or explain, I’m suddenly feeling much better.  I’m ready to go decorate the tree at least.  And as for writing, well… time and the crossed path will tell.

← Older posts
Newer posts →

“Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? — every, every minute?”

-- Thornton Wilder, "Our Town"

Enter your email address to receive notifications of new posts.


prev|rnd|list|next
© Janell A West and An Everyday Life, January 2009 to Current Date. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

Recent Posts

  • Queen of Salads
  • Sweater Weather
  • Summer Lull Salads
  • That Roman Feast
  • Remodel Redux
  • Déjà vu, Déjà Voodoo
  • One Good Egg

Artful Living

  • Fred Gonsowski Garden Home
  • Kylie M Interiors
  • Laurel Bern Interiors
  • Lee Abbamonte
  • Mid-Century Modern Remodel
  • Ripple Effects
  • The Creativity Exchange
  • The Task at Hand
  • Tongue in Cheek
  • Zen & the Art of Tightrope Walking

Family ~ Now & Then

  • Chronicling America
  • Family
  • Kyle West
  • Pieces of Reese's Life
  • Vermont Digital Newspaper Project

Food for Life!

  • Elizabeth Minchilli in Rome
  • Manger
  • Once Upon a Chef
  • The Everyday French Chef

Literary Spaces

  • A Striped Armchair
  • Dolce Bellezza
  • Lit Salad
  • Living with Literature
  • Marks in the Margin
  • So Many Books
  • The Millions

the Garden, the Garden

  • An Obsessive Neurotic Gardener
  • Potager
  • Red Dirt Ramblings

Archives

Categories

  • Far Away Places
  • Good Reads
  • Home Restoration
  • In the Garden
  • In the Kitchen
  • Life at Home
  • Mesta Park
  • Prayer
  • Soul Care
  • The Great Outdoors
  • Writing

Meta

  • Create account
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Blog at WordPress.com.

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • an everyday life
    • Join 89 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • an everyday life
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...