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Whenever I hear an interesting string of words, I pull out my journal and take notes just like a detective. This morning my friend Joni found words on the foil seal of a carton of Daisy Sour Cream — “The most precious thing one can make is a friend.” — and she thought I might like to record them, as I’ve done with other words off and on all weekend.
Twice yesterday I pulled my journal out; once while touring a thoroughbred horse farm and again when touring the Woodford Reserve Bourbon Distillery. When the tour guide at the horse farm spoke of how dangerous it can be when a horse becomes spooked at the starting gate, I wrote down her phrase ”one thousand pounds of freaking.’ And later, after driving back to Joni’s from touring the distillery, my friend Donna used this expression — “as serious as a heart attack” — about whatever she was talking about. Perhaps it’s a fairly common expression to some. But to my ears, it was uncommon and worth notation.
But this morning, I was not moved to write down the Daisy lid saying because I found it troubling. On the heels of a wonderful weekend with my four gal pals, the words ‘make’ and ‘friend’ just didn’t seem to belong together. These words were not friends. At the same time, I am untroubled by using the word ‘make’ in connection with either bourbon whiskey or thoroughbred race horses. I’ve learned that the making of race horses and bourbon whiskey requires time and passion and even a bit of science in the following of defined and results-proven processes, in addition to having good genes and good ingredients.
As I think about these four friends of mine and how different we are, I marvel that we should even be friends. We did not choose one another out of desire or will. Instead, our friendship seems so happenstance. And this happenstance nature makes me question whether friends like us can truly be made. And if not, are they instead begotten by God?
It will take more time to sort out my thoughts before I’m able to draw a conclusion.
an everyday life 
Wish I had known you were going to Lousville, That is were granddad great-grandfather is buried. He owned a plantation, that is now owned by a banker in Louisville. Whenwe went to Kentucky(your Mom, Aunt Jo and I we toured the farm. I could have sent you the man’s name wo has done all the workl on the family tree. Jane
Boy, I wish I’d told you. Louisville was lovely. Maybe you, Christi & I need to make the pilgrimage over that way sometime. Lots of antiques over there!
Sounds good to me . Maybe next year in October we can go to the family reunion and take Joann
I’ve known the expression “serious as a heart attack” for years. I don’t think I heard it until I came to Texas, but that could have as much to do with the era as geography.
Funny – I like the thought of “making friends”. It suggests the importance of intentionality to me – that friendship doesn’t just happen.
In my very first WordPress blog, I mentioned the fact that, if I was going to succeed at this little thing called blogging, technology would have to become my friend. And then I added this line:
“Friendship, of course, takes time. It requires energy, and perseverance. Friendship isn’t an afternoon project, a weekend diversion, a passing inclination for those times when nothing else piques interest. Friendship is a commitment as well as a delight; it requires attentiveness and care.”
Humph. After a year and a half, I wouldn’t change a word! Of course, everything I said applies to the time AFTER the inclination toward friendship already has developed, and that’s the mystery you’re hinting at.
Lovely post.
Your words on ‘making’ friends are indeed all true.
But yet — in and admidst it all, and not just at the beginning, runs this mysterious thread of grace that knits it all together and does as much toward the creating and preserving the freindship as the actions undertaken by either party to the freindship. For sometimes even in the poorest of circumstances — inattentiveness and laziness — it simmers on the back burner waiting to be move to front where it can be enjoyed. What causes all this good will and love to remain amidst forgetfulness and the busyness of life? By all rights, the friendship should languish. But instead, the thread is there to pick up and resume in a seamless way. What grace!
Thanks for your sharing your wisdom. Yours and the comments of a freind received off-blog are providing me good food for further thought.