Flipping over May

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Just reaching out, on this very rainy night in Oklahoma City, to say that all is well.  That I’m glad it’s June.  That I hope the end of May will mean that the worst of storms are behind us.  And most of all, that my mental flipping of the calendar page has me thinking, seriously for the first time, of adding a safe room to our home.

On storm infested nights like this, it helps to acknowledge that my family and I have weathered another wave of May storms.  No small feat, this year, since it seems everyone here knows someone that knows someone that lost something big on May 20th.  Homes.  Businesses.  Peace of mind… whether watching on the sidelines or suffering a direct hit.

I don’t yet know what additional damage has come from tonight’s storms. Instead, I know there were too many too close for comfort calls in May.  My family alone knows three family members of students pulled alive from the rubble of Plaza Towers and Briarwood Elementary Schools. And while I don’t know anyone from the families suffering the loss of loved ones, I feel connected to them nevertheless.  It’s been that way since May 20th, since I first watched the “Moore” tornado form on live t.v, as I listened to familiar street names, rattled off by excited weathermen, become coordinates of the twister’s vectored path… to realize.. that these intersections were home to large residential areas, that schools and churches were located there… that one coordinate was the location of my youngest daughter’s first home… another just blocks from my youngest child’s home till a month ago.  it was beyond surreal.

I didn’t know, until the twister had almost run its course, that my eldest daughter and her family were lying in wait for the EF-5 to hit, either in borrowed storm shelters or in buildings lying in the twister’s direct path.  In my mind, I had them all safely tucked out of harm’s way.  I don’t know why.  But perhaps I was playing some sort of Proustian mind-game… to believe what I needed to believe was true.

Yes, no doubt about it… on nights like this, full of tornado warnings and hail and torrential rainfall and flash floods, full of stress and fear and uncertainty of whether to flee or face incoming storms at home… it helps to remember how lucky my family and I have been … this time around the calendar.  But I never knew till now, how long thirty-one days could feel.

The Laundry Channel

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Jamaica CarnivalLast week’s sailing in the western Caribbean seems far removed from the stacks of laundry surrounding me.

It doesn’t seem real that we swam with dolphins four days ago.  That only five have passed since we parasailed with friends in Grand Cayman.  Or that Jamaica — the land of “no problems… and only situations,” where the header photo was shot six days ago — should feel as fuzzy as any ethereal memory freshly minted by dreams.  How is it that the good feeling created by vacations carries over, while the concrete specifics of good times wash away from memory… minutes after they happen?

My husband and I’ve been home less than two days, enough time to work through seven loads of laundry.  I didn’t realize we owned so many clothes.  But somehow, it’s the clothes that anchor the reality of our dreamy cruise vacation with Texas friends.  I remember wearing the red ruffled tank with the shimmery pants on Monday evening.  Wednesday saw me in white denim cropped pants and Caribbean blue tank.  Thursday, a Hibiscus red cotton skirt with an indigo blue tank.

Each outfit carries a care label, which I follow to a T.  Cold water wash.  Tumble dry low.  Lie flat.  Line dry.  And though I have no clothes line, the chair backs of my patio table make perfect personal valets to dry wet shirts and pants upon.  Yesterday’s warm sunshine and strong winds witnessed four “loads” hanging across those metal chair backs.

Even now, I marvel at how easily this trip fell into place.  I didn’t expect invitations extended in late January to two Texas couples to be received so positively…. that they would rearrange planned events in their lives to make it happen… all to join me and help celebrate my husband’s recent retirement.  When I thanked them for coming, they said they were honored to be asked.  All week long, we took turns saying how wonderful a time we were having together.  And how nice it would be if we could make it all happen again.

But here’s the surprise souvenir from my time away:  I return to laundry and “real” life knowing that it will be okay if the miracle of traveling with these dear friends never happens again.  Because when something is good enough the first time, fine enough to feel like it belongs to the world of dreams rather than waking life, repetition becomes unnecessary.  Once becomes enough for a lifetime.

Which makes me wonder whether there are greater lessons to be learned in what happens in everyday life.  In those things, like laundry, which require routine repetition.

Green Beans & Good Deeds

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Weeks of Lenten pondering has led to an Easter-tide realization…that nothing I can do will ever rise to the lofty standard of being good.  Certainly, my thinking roots back to that biblical text of God calling His creation good… against those pointed words memorialized in Luke, where Jesus disassociates himself from goodness with a theoretical ten-foot pole cross, by saying

“Why do you call me good. Nobody is good except for God.”

I once confused the standard of ‘good” with being ‘good enough.”  Where now I know that good is better than I know.  Better than I am.  And that only on my better days, can I offer up ‘good enough.’

Upon that landscape, I’ll still confess that if someone (or something) calls out for assistance, I do what I can to help — even when I know I’ll fall short of doing the good others deserve.  Some weeks I pour time out and spread myself thin, while others, like the last two, not so much. I’ve no need to recount details, but my “good enough” deeds usually connect me to one of my four children.   Sometimes to Sis or Aunt Jane.  But rarely beyond these.  Which may be why I wish to record this one that took place during the dark days of Lent, that had me fulfilling a strange promise to a stranger living out west that I’d earlier tracked down via Facebook’s email system.

Yes, I’m back on Facebook — for the moment, anyway — because of some good-deeding  committed to last autumn.  A pastor friend of mine is writing a book and he wished to more easily facilitate comments within a digital writing support group on Facebook… and since I was the only holdout, and wished to help…

Facebook has its place and its uses.  One, I’ve learned, is this:  For the bargain price of one dollar, I can contact anyone in Facebook’s planetary system, including a lady whose one-of-a-kind name appeared at the top of an ultrasound photo taken of her unborn child….hmm.. seven years ago, I think.  Or was it eleven?  Funny how I can no longer recall and that the number of years no longer matters.

The image had fallen out of a used paperback I was reading, Michael Cunningham’s The Hours, which I had purchased online from a vendor near Seattle.  It’s a fine tale, one that weaves together three stories of three women living in separate times and states, more or less connected together by another novel…. this one, Virginia Woolf’s, Mrs. Dalloway.  I read The Hours during Advent….and I suppose the stranger who first owned it read the book during her pregnancy.  Perhaps she marked her progress in the paperback with an ultrasound photo, before losing track of both.

Rather than tossing the picture out, I set it aside, only to let it gather dust till I ran across it again a few days after Ash Wednesday, buried in my unread stacks of books.  I decided to spare a few minutes to the internet, which led me to Facebook and its lost mother… which led me to draft a strange email that began…. “I hope you’ll not find this too weird, but….”

Now sitting more than two months removed from this event, I wish to say that if that Lenten good-enough deed of mine was weird, how I wish to see more like it in the world, and more of it from me.  So much so, that it would not seem weird at all.  Because… who am I kidding?  Isn’t life, at its best, wonderfully weird?  And isn’t it when we try to keep life in the bounds of the middle of the bell curve, so that we don’t stand out, that life falls strangely flat? You’ll not be surprised, I imagine, to hear that the mother, still unknown to me, still a stranger to me on Facebook (since we are not friends), was overjoyed at my boldness in my reaching out to her past from my present.

Perhaps the weirdest part of all these lines… is that I had not intended to share this strange story between strangers when I began this post.  Instead, I’d planned to share a different one about a landscape design for a prayer garden I’d created for another pastor friend of mine who serves an inner-city Methodist church.  But here we are, with a header photo strangely out of place with the print surrounding it.

That the execution of that landscape design calls for many “good” deeds and ornamental plant material — but no green beans or other edibles — leads me the other original goal of the post: To share a trio of recipes involving green beans that connect me back to three women I love who live or lived in different times and places. It seems right to at least make good on this one.  Because in one way or another, as noted within the recipes below, these green beans have each been synonymous with good deeds.  And there is nothing flat tasting about these.

#1 ~~ Greek Green Beans

Thanks to Aunt Jane, who first preserved my grandfather’s recipe in word…

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2 15 oz cans of green beans, drained
1/2 cup chopped onion
2 minced garlic cloves
2 Tbsp olive oil
2 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp salt (more or less)
1/4 tsp pepper
1/4 tsp allspice
1 8oz can tomato sauce
1 15 oz can petite tomatoes
1 cup of water
 
In a large sauce pan over medium to medium-low heat, saute onion in olive oil for 3 to 4 minutes.  Add garlic and spices and stir for a minute, before adding tomato sauce, tomatoes and water.  Simmer uncovered over low heat for 30 minutes.  Add drained green beans and simmer another 20 to 30 minutes.  Serve with slices of crusty bread, as a meal in itself or as a side, with my grandfather’s roasted chicken or fried pork chops.
 

Amy’s Asian Green Beans

 
Thanks to Amy for sharing her mother’s best friend’s recipe… and for serving them up with a Christmas dinner prepared a few days after my mother-in-law’s passing;  I hope to never forget such kindness, nor that lovely dinner.
 
Amy's Green Beans photo
Add the following ingredients to an oven-safe casserole dish and bake 20-30 minutes at 350 degrees.
 
2 strips of crumbed crisp bacon
1/2 cup of chopped onion, sauteed in 2 Tbsp olive oil.
1 12 oz bag frozen green beans
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/3 cup, scant 1 Tbsp, Soy Sauce (original recipe called for Teriyaki Sauce)
1 – 2 Tbsp water
 

Everyday Green Beans

 
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Thanks to Kate, who told Kara, who told me about the wonders of using broth instead of water… to Mom for the bacon… and Aunt Jo for the chopped onions, that she used to season most vegetables cooked upon her stove top.  This is a true hither and yon family combination….
 
2 strips of crumbled crisp bacon
1/2 cup of chopped onion, sauteed in bacon fat or olive oil
2 cans of drained green beans
2 cups of beef broth
 
Bring to a boil and simmer for a few minutes before serving.