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an everyday life

an everyday life

Category Archives: Soul Care

Tears and Fears

26 Saturday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Prayer, Soul Care

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Bible, Everyday Life, Love, Prayer

I had no plan to write about this morning’s biblical readings when I sat down at the keyboard this afternoon.  But that’s often how writing is with me.  I sit down to write one thing and out comes another.   I guess the stronger words reign victorious in their fight for life.

Of course, the Bible is full of strong words, many which make for disturbing thoughts.  Sometimes I’m desolate after my morning quiet time, as I see that people across time haven’t changed much — and that the changes for good within myself are painfully slow.  Perhaps, in some ways, we are all slow learners, especially when it comes to learning the lessons that matter most in life.

This morning’s reading from Psalms was a variation on the old “eye-for-an-eye” theme.  Most would agree that there is nothing wrong in expecting value for value;  to settle for anything less than what we are due is to be taken advantage of — and God knows, I feel stupid when I’ve let someone get the best of me.

Yet, in my favorite prayer chair this morning, I felt more disturbed than stupid, as I listened to the psalmist’s heart-wrenching prayer.  Distilling through all the rhetoric, I heard the psalmist’s pray boil down to this:  “We scratched your back and now God, it’s your turn to scratch ours.   Don’t let us down, man.”

I wonder how the psalmist prayer sat with God, as I flee for the good news of John.  After the Psalms, I’m in need of a bit of good news.  But it doesn’t take long for my eyes to water as truth splashes me in the face.

I’m now sitting with Jesus, who is pouring out his heart to teach others about his family business.  Jesus it seems, is full of heavenly notions about what it really means to love God and what it really means to love one another.  It’s clear that Jesus is upsetting the apple cart  with lessons that don’t quite mesh with his audience’s way of thinking.  Doesn’t Jesus see that he’s letting his listeners down?

I finally escape to John’s first epistle where I see the old apostle imploring his flock to love.  “All you need is love, folks — heavenly business is simple enough for a baby to do,” John seems to say.  “There’s no need to worry about whose turn it is to do what, forget about keeping tallies, everyone’s a winner when love trumps fear.”

This doddering saint seems to be saying that when we let one another down, we let down God and worse of all — at least in God’s eye — we let down ourselves.  Heavenly business seems to be about stooping down to pick up the ones that are let down by life and making them the apple of our eyes.  Back scratching is just one way to express it.

Christmas Eve Grinches

25 Friday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Soul Care, The Great Outdoors

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Christmas Eve, Everyday Life, Silent Night, Snow Storms, Soul Care

written on Christmas Eve, disconnected from the world…

It will be a rare, white Christmas for us this year.

The interstates are closed.  Stranded motorists – in route to Christmas gatherings or doing last-minute errands — are waiting for the National Guard.

Closer to home, no buses are running up and down Walker Avenue.  No cars are skating the slippery side-streets.  I’ve swept snow off my porches more times than I can shake a broomstick at.  I’m guessing ten to twelve inches so far.

The internet is down and snow continues to fall.  We are cut off.  We are set apart from the rest of the world by snow.  We are living in a Christmas song.

Silent night; Holy night.

Yet all is not calm.  Nor is it bright.  Ever so often the wind howls.  Snow puffs up and curls like smoke from rooftops.

If it were not for that occasional gust of wind, it would be silent.  I feel as is we are living a quiet country life on the edge of downtown.

It’s odd to be living in a silent night rather than singing about it at Christmas Eve church service.   And it’s strange to be living a White Christmas rather than dreaming it through song.  But the unexpected gift of a White Christmas is firmly on my doorstep, no matter how many times I try to sweep it away.

For years I’ve dreamed of gathering family around a Christmas brunch.  This was to be my year.  But what was to be brunch for twelve will be brunch for three.

Several of the dishes – a breakfast casserole and my Aunt Jo’s pull-apart coffee cake – will be made tonight.  Earlier today I baked a dozen Red Velvet Cupcakes with peppermint cream cheese frosting.

The rest of my menu  —  the blackberry blue corn muffins, the cinnamon rolls, the brown-sugar bacon, the pancakes – will keep for another brunch.  Some day.

For now, my unexpected guest is the snow that has come.  It has closed roads and canceled many gatherings in its path to get here.

Yet, my story is not about a Snow-Grinch stealing away my Christmas brunch dreams.  Christmas will come whether we gather at church or around a dreamy brunch.  Christmas is full of miracles no matter how it comes wrapped.

I’m living in a beautiful Christmas greeting card.  And from where I sit all snug and warm, it’s a fine place to worship Christ and new birth, against a landscape frosted in  un-driven snow.  As you can see…my candle it lit, without need of church.

Angel Wings

13 Sunday Dec 2009

Posted by Janell in Life at Home, Soul Care

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Everyday Life, Friends, George Bailey, It's A Wonderful Life, Saints, Soul Care

There is a metaphor for life hidden in today’s fog smudged horizon of sea and sky.

Truth is, we often don’t know where out next step or thought will take us.  The fog opens only as we step or think our way into it.  We may make plans toward a certain horizon, yet lay them aside for something else that comes along.  One step leads to another until many steps down the road, we have become the people our steps and thoughts have made us.

All the people, places and experiences I have known have,  in some imperceptible way, shaped me into the person I am today.  Had I not known them, I would be different.  Most were small differences.  But at times, I was pointed toward changes that opened up life toward fresh horizons.

And yet, those life opening events did not appear important at the time.  I recall one change that came by one who was not much more than a friendly acquaintance.  Our husbands were friends and she and I were along for the ride.  Who can say why Paula took such an interest in my failure to land that elusive first accounting job?  But she did.

Paula held no important position in the community.  Nor did Paula hold an influential position at the bank where she worked.  So when Paula told me she was going to put in a good word on my behalf, with the public accounting firm that served as the bank’s independent auditor, I didn’t believe anything would come of it.

But I’m glad she didn’t see it that way.  The discouraging fog that often hems us in from helping others was just not in Paula’s line of vision.  This small hourly worker, who later became a waitress, went up to the firm’s hiring partner and landed me an invitation to interview.  All I had to do was call and schedule a time.

I placed the call with memory of many rejections still fresh in my mind, only to learn from the receptionist that the firm wasn’t hiring.  Had Paula not followed up, I would never have shared the bad news.  But rather than letting the matter drop, Paula decided to hold the accounting firm accountable for its seemingly wishy-washy actions.  Of course, the audit partner didn’t know the receptionist was screening job candidates on her own.

After the fog cleared, I had my first accounting job, a gift from this girl who refused to give up on me when I had given up on myself.  And while I know I thanked her, she can’t know what her one intervening action did for my life because I didn’t know to tell her.  It was only much later that I realized what she had done, and by then, our paths had already parted.

There are many fog lifting experiences like this in my life.  And I imagine we  all have experienced them, if we but take the time to remember them.   We are beneficiaries of people who take an unexplained interest in us.

These life-givers are the George Bailey’s in our everyday lives that teach us it’s a wonderful life indeed.  Of course the fog keeps them from seeing their own greatness.  But I’d like to think that, just like George Bailey, they get that occasional glimpse through an angelic message of glad tidings.

Dear George,

Remember no man is a failure who has friends.

Thanks for the wings!

Love, Clarence

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“Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it? — every, every minute?”

-- Thornton Wilder, "Our Town"

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© Janell A West and An Everyday Life, January 2009 to Current Date. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.

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